Paddy looked up from his pint of Guinness and gazed longingly at the passing truck full of turf. He turned to Murphy and said, "When I win the lottery, I shall be doing that."
"What, drive a truck?" asked his friend.
"No, yer daft egit. Send me lawn away to be mown."
"Look, darling," said May to her husband. "Here's that fence where we first made love."
Jim looked up and down the path, then pulled her towards him. "Come on! For old time's sake!" She giggled, and soon they were making passionate love against the fence.
"Wow," said Jim afterwards. "You're even better than you were 30 years ago."
"The fence wasn't electrified then," replied May.